Dogs and Lightbulbs

How Many Dogs Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?

• Golden Retriever: The sun is shining. The day is young. We've got our whole lives ahead of us. And you're inside worrying about a stupid, burned-out light bulb?

• Border Collie: Just one. Not only that, but I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.

• Dachshund: You know I can't reach that stupid lamp!

• Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.

• Rottweiler: Make me!

• Shi-tzu: Puh-leeze, dah-ling. Let the servants...

• Lab: Oh, me, me!!! Pleeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeeeze, please, please, please!

• German Shepherd: I'll change it as soon as I've led these people from the dark, checked to make sure I haven't missed any, and make just one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the situation.

• Malamute: Let the Border collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy.

• Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture.

• Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.

• Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.

• Doberman Pinscher: Make me.

• Boxer: Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark...

• Mastiff: Mastiffs are NOT afraid of the dark.

• Hound Dog: ZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzz... z...z... z....z.... z....z...

• Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb.

• Irish Wolfhound: Can somebody else do it? I've got a hangover.

• Pointer: I see it, there it is, there it is, right there...

• Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?

• Australian Shepherd: First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle...

• Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? I'm sorry, but I don't see a light bulb?

• Cat: Dogs do not change light bulbs. People change light bulbs. So, the real question is: How long will it be before I can expect some light, some dinner, and a massage?

All of which proves, once again, that while dogs have masters, cats have a staff.