Three guys, a Canadian, Osama Bin Ladin, and President Bush are out walking together one day. They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it.
"I will give each of you each one wish, that's three wishes total," says the Genie.
The Canadian says, "I am a farmer, my dad was a farmer, and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in Canada."
With a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' the land in Canada was forever made fertile for farming.
Osama Bin Ladin was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around Afghanistan, so that no infidels, Jews or Americans can come into our precious state."
Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' there was a huge wall around Afghanistan.
President Bush says, "I'm very curious, please tell me more about this wall."
The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 15,000 feet high, 500 feet thick and completely surrounds the country; nothing can get in or out. It is virtually impenetrable."
President Bush says, "Fill it with water."
George Bush and Osama decided to settle the war once and for all. They sat down and decided to settle the whole dispute with one dogfight. They would have 5 years to breed the best fighting dog in the world and whichever side's dog won would be entitled to dominate the world.
Osama found the biggest, meanest Doberman and Rottweiler female dogs in the world and bred them with the biggest, meanest Siberian wolves.
They selected only the biggest and strongest puppy from each litter, remove his siblings, which gave him all the milk. After 5 years they came up with the biggest, meanest dog the world had ever seen. Its cage needed steel bars that were 5" thick and nobody could get near it.
When the day came for the dogfight, Bush showed up with a strange looking animal. It was a 9 foot long Dachshund. Every one felt sorry for Bush because they knew there was no way that this dog could possibly last 10 seconds with the Afghanistan dog. When the cages were opened up, the Dachshund came out of its cage and slowly waddled over towards Osama's dog. Osama's dog snarled and leaped out of its cage and charged the American Dachshund,
But when it got close enough to bite the Dachshund's neck, the Dachshund opened its mouth and consumed Osama's dog in one bite. There was nothing left of the entire dog.
Osama came up to Bush, shaking his head in disbelief. "We don't understand how this could have happened. We had our best people working for 5 years with the meanest Doberman and Rottweiler female dogs in the world and the biggest, meanest Siberian wolves."
"That's nothing." said Bush. "We had our best plastic surgeons working for 5 years to make that alligator look like a weenie dog.
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