Relieving Stress with a New Name

Sometimes when you have a stressful day or week, you need some silliness to break up the day. Here is your dose... Follow the instructions to find your funny name. The following is an excerpt from a children's book, "Captain Underpants and the Perilous Plot of Professor Poopypants", by Dave Pilkey. The evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names. Lest we take ourselves too seriously, take a moment to find your new name and wear it with humor for the day...

Use the first letter of your first name to determine your NEW first name:

a = stinky      n = zippy
b = lumpy o = goober
c = buttercup p = doofus
d = gidget q = slimy
e = crusty r = loopy
f = greasy s = snotty
g = fluffy t = falafel
h = cheeseball u = dorkey
i = chim-chim v = squeezit
j = poopsie w = oprah
k = flunky x = skipper
l = booger y = dinky
m = pinky z = zsa-zsa

Use the first letter of your last name to determine the first half of your NEW last name:

a = diaper      n = rhino
b = toilet o = burger
c = giggle p = hamster
d = bubble q = toad
e = girdle r = gizzard
f = barf s = pizza
g = lizard t = gerbil
h = waffle u = chicken
i = cootie v = pickle
j = monkey w = chuckle
k = potty x = tofu
l = liver y = gorilla
m = banana z = stinker

Use the last letter of your last name to determine the second half of your NEW last name:

a = head      n = chunks
b = mouth o = hiney
c = face p = biscuits
d = nose q = toes
e = tush r = buns
f = breath s = fanny
g = pants t = sniffer
h = shorts u = sprinkles
i = lips v = kisser
j = honker w = squirt
k = butt x = humperdinck
l = brain y = brains
m = tushie z = juice

Thus, for example, George W. Bush's new name is Fluffy Toiletshorts. (Go figure).

Clinton's new name is Oprah Gigglechunks. Al Gore would become Stinky Lizardtush (how appropriate)

Stinky Cootiehiney

Note that the original email supposedly didn't exactly match the book, in what letters to use... Since I don't have the book, I can't confirm it, but I think I have the correct ones from other sites. Here's are a few sites with the chart, even with neat automated lookups.
~jw, otherwise known as Poopsie ChuckleChunks